*I’ll be uploading my Instagram posts from our time in NICU, followed by a more recent picture of Rex, so you’ll be able to see the difference and keep-up with our journey*
29th May 2019
“Happy hump day everyone. Am off to see Rex a little later today. I’ve got a home appointment with someone from a charity who helps support new parents of preemies, when they’re struggling. And, I am really struggling. I can’t pinpoint one thing – it’s the whole situation that’s taking its toll. So, I’ve reached out and asked for some help. Mainly because I’m aware our NICU journey is far from over. It’s a draining mix of worry, no sleep, heavy responsibility with no break, the unknown, HORMONES, guilt, and being separated from Rex every night. But, I still have plenty of happy moments, and Marv still makes me lol every day, so it’s unlike any depression or anxiety I’ve experienced before. There’s also no pattern to it. I just don’t feel like my personal mental health tool kit, is helping at all…so I’ve got some help-in.
I’ve also noticed that certain OCD traits are creeping back in. I’m totally aware it’s because of my constant intense routine, coupled with the emphasis we have on germ and infection control. So I need some help to change my thought process and the resulting actions.
To be honest, I’m most looking forward to having a cup of tea and a long chat with someone who has experience with our situation. I’ve always found talking therapies super helpful. I’m a natural chatter, and can often end up working things out as I say them out loud. Anywho, that’s my morning today, and I’m actually looking forward to it. I hope you get to enjoy someone’s company IRL today x”
Peace, love, and better days ahead, Fay x
